I had never been on a blind date before, but based off of the movies I had set my expectations low. I was suited up for this sorority formal and my goal was to meet some new people and have a good time. Tiffany, my date, couldn’t find someone in time so I decided to step in last minute. As soon as a I saw her turn the corner down the street I was caught off guard. This beautiful girl in a long white dress stood before me and I couldn’t help, but stare. We jumped into conversation pretty easily (I felt like I was talking a lot and fast…), but the night continued with laughing, shenanigans, and fun. I starting realizing how drawn I was to her. We spent time together everyday after that formal and then I had to leave to the next city while Tiffany remained in Austin…
I was in a stage of my life where I had been single for a long time and had never really been in a serious relationship. I was tired of having shallow connections, but also tired of trying to look for someone so I finally stopped looking and focused on me. There is a difference between looking for a relationship and letting yourself be open to one. In one case I looked for companionship in another person because it’s what I thought would make me happy and the other I focused on my life and if I were to meet someone who I can vibe with then I wouldn’t be afraid to commit.
Thanks to iMessage we talked everyday after that for a month. Something was keeping my heart in Austin. I finally asked Tiffany to join me on the trip for 2 weeks. She joined me in Washington D.C. and left 2 weeks later in New York. During that time spent in close quarters 24/7 in an RV, we were drawn closer together until we finally reached a crossroad. Would I start a long distance relationship, while being on the road and no idea what future was in front of me? One of the scary things is whether you trust yourself with taking a risk. Sometimes I make excuses and say,”how could this work? What if I just end up hurting you? What if I end up hurting myself?”
“It is a risk to love. What if it doesn’t work out? Ah, but what if it does.” (Peter McWilliams)
I was caught in these questions, but finally I was confronted with one thought: have I ever felt this way before? You can fear what could happen or you can explore what it could become. There is something about taking a leap of faith where you need to trust yourself enough to learn on the go. Especially at my age I realize more and more how many things I don’t know. The only way to grow is to explore. Who knows if I will ever understand women, but I better damn well try!
The point is that I don’t know what is going happen in the future. But I can’t ignore the opportunities in front of me. I have to trust that I can make the most out of an experience regardless. You will be surprised how much life will offer in return. Tiffany teaches me new things everyday whether she realizes it or not. I will never regret taking this leap of faith.